Transitioning
I am leaving the world of undercover secret missions and entering a new phase in my professional life
Continuing
My commitment to protecting the innocent and maintaining National security stands, but I will be doing so in the public eye from this point forward
Classifying
I will still have access to Top Secret information
Contacting
Backchannels will remain open and be monitored should my expertise or mentoring be required
Recognizing
Thank you all
Confirming
Regardless of these changes, I will always be a hot covert operative
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Dedication Attraction Mate (OE)
Asking
Barack offered me the job
Deciding
I have yet to accept
Electing
Apparently I have more appeal among women than Hillary
Recognizing
I'd be a hot Vice President
Blowing
I would never be able to go on an undercover covert mission again
Recruiting
I may find myself in need of staff
Reiterating
Regardless of the outcome I will continue to maintain National security
Barack offered me the job
Deciding
I have yet to accept
Electing
Apparently I have more appeal among women than Hillary
Recognizing
I'd be a hot Vice President
Blowing
I would never be able to go on an undercover covert mission again
Recruiting
I may find myself in need of staff
Reiterating
Regardless of the outcome I will continue to maintain National security
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Survival Training: Knowledge Transfer
The following course is worth 0 secret agent continuing education credits. It is, however, required as it has proved to enhance the success of maintaining National security with the added benefit of operative survival.
Due to changing times and the unique needs of National security in a variety of operational theaters a portion of training must of neccessity be OJT. This course is an opportunity for up and coming agents to discourse with experienced mentors who have survived many a covert operation. It is a unique opportunity because, due to the nature of secret missions, many of you will not survive without this critical knowledge. Many of you will not survive anyway but that is part of the commitment to National security.
At this time you may raise questions or topics that you would like to address which you believe will help you in your quest for National security.
The final examination for this course is pass / fail based on what happens in the field.
Due to changing times and the unique needs of National security in a variety of operational theaters a portion of training must of neccessity be OJT. This course is an opportunity for up and coming agents to discourse with experienced mentors who have survived many a covert operation. It is a unique opportunity because, due to the nature of secret missions, many of you will not survive without this critical knowledge. Many of you will not survive anyway but that is part of the commitment to National security.
At this time you may raise questions or topics that you would like to address which you believe will help you in your quest for National security.
The final examination for this course is pass / fail based on what happens in the field.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Pharmacy Chef Cup (OE)
Training
I took a hard shot the other day during secret agent hand to hand combat practice and it felt like a part of my anatomy was crushed and, perhaps, ruptured. After I recovered enough to breathe, I was unable to discern if everything was still there. I continued because, had this been a real secret mission, National security does not take an injury time out.
Verifying
After I returned to the rebel base and applied some ice I was able to make sure that I still had all my body parts
Defending
Now that I know I can survive such an attack there is no reason for me to not wear additional protective equipment
Travelling
I am going on a covert operation to XXXXX, XX this week. The exact date is Top Secret. If you see me there rest assured you won't recognize me.
Cooking
I met someone named after a popular Italian dish. It was not, however, spelled correctly on her name tag.
Evolving
I suppose we couldn't expect people to name their children after over the counter cold medicine forever
I took a hard shot the other day during secret agent hand to hand combat practice and it felt like a part of my anatomy was crushed and, perhaps, ruptured. After I recovered enough to breathe, I was unable to discern if everything was still there. I continued because, had this been a real secret mission, National security does not take an injury time out.
Verifying
After I returned to the rebel base and applied some ice I was able to make sure that I still had all my body parts
Defending
Now that I know I can survive such an attack there is no reason for me to not wear additional protective equipment
Travelling
I am going on a covert operation to XXXXX, XX this week. The exact date is Top Secret. If you see me there rest assured you won't recognize me.
Cooking
I met someone named after a popular Italian dish. It was not, however, spelled correctly on her name tag.
Evolving
I suppose we couldn't expect people to name their children after over the counter cold medicine forever
Monday, May 19, 2008
King Time Gold (OE)
Illing
I have a contagious disease
Promising
It's called date OE and you're guaranteed to end up with a ring on your finger
Clarifying
From someone else who isn't a covert operative
Noticing
Every woman who gets into a relationship with me is married within a year and a half after we break up
Balancing
It isn't uncommon for a secret agent to have difficult relationships due to the demands of covert operations
Sacrificing
Heavy is the crown of National security
I have a contagious disease
Promising
It's called date OE and you're guaranteed to end up with a ring on your finger
Clarifying
From someone else who isn't a covert operative
Noticing
Every woman who gets into a relationship with me is married within a year and a half after we break up
Balancing
It isn't uncommon for a secret agent to have difficult relationships due to the demands of covert operations
Sacrificing
Heavy is the crown of National security
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Language Sheet Confirmation (OE)
Training
Went against a world champion today. Which solidified my suspicions that although I may be a world class covert operative, I am not a world champion in waiting when it comes to hand to hand combat.
Anatomizing
This has nothing to do with the lack of double jointedness in my toes
Sleeping
I purchased a new mattress for the bed in the rebel base master bedroom. It was expensive but the exact price is Top Secret.
Comforting
When I laid down on it I felt like I was floating. This can only be good for National security.
Televising
I recall a documentary on Discovery channel about the dirtiest places in the home and it turns out it's the bedroom. This is primarily due to dust mites. The salesperson at the mattress store said that a mattress can gain 10 pounds a year due to dust mites.
Analyzing
That's the kind of datum that will get a covert operative's attention
Replacing
I made my way to Target, where I get all of my covert operative gear for secret missions, to purchase all new bedding including pillows and a mattress cover. There's no way I was going to spread any dust mites into my new mattress.
Driving
It is generally a bad idea to haul an oversize load on 285 during rush hour. It is especially bad when I am trying to get to Target.
Blogging
Silly little French comments don't even register to a secret agent who's life is dedicated to maintaining National security
Ending
That is all
Misdirecting
Never will I
Leaving
Off to the new mattress I go
Went against a world champion today. Which solidified my suspicions that although I may be a world class covert operative, I am not a world champion in waiting when it comes to hand to hand combat.
Anatomizing
This has nothing to do with the lack of double jointedness in my toes
Sleeping
I purchased a new mattress for the bed in the rebel base master bedroom. It was expensive but the exact price is Top Secret.
Comforting
When I laid down on it I felt like I was floating. This can only be good for National security.
Televising
I recall a documentary on Discovery channel about the dirtiest places in the home and it turns out it's the bedroom. This is primarily due to dust mites. The salesperson at the mattress store said that a mattress can gain 10 pounds a year due to dust mites.
Analyzing
That's the kind of datum that will get a covert operative's attention
Replacing
I made my way to Target, where I get all of my covert operative gear for secret missions, to purchase all new bedding including pillows and a mattress cover. There's no way I was going to spread any dust mites into my new mattress.
Driving
It is generally a bad idea to haul an oversize load on 285 during rush hour. It is especially bad when I am trying to get to Target.
Blogging
Silly little French comments don't even register to a secret agent who's life is dedicated to maintaining National security
Ending
That is all
Misdirecting
Never will I
Leaving
Off to the new mattress I go
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Survival Training: Applied Mathematics
The following is worth 3 secret agent continuing education credits.
In the course of covert operations a secret agent's ability to quickly analyze situations, apply logical reasoning, and come to conclusions can be the difference between survival and an unpleasant death. While complex calculations can be done when there is enough time, it is often the case where simple algebra, or even addition and subtraction, can be used to approximate a result. This is best exemplified using a story problem example recently observed by an operative during a mission.
Airport security + A large Japanese Ginzu chopping knife + Somebody's carry on luggage
= An abundance of unwanted, and very personal, TSA attention
Attention to details is critical for maintaining National security
In the course of covert operations a secret agent's ability to quickly analyze situations, apply logical reasoning, and come to conclusions can be the difference between survival and an unpleasant death. While complex calculations can be done when there is enough time, it is often the case where simple algebra, or even addition and subtraction, can be used to approximate a result. This is best exemplified using a story problem example recently observed by an operative during a mission.
Airport security + A large Japanese Ginzu chopping knife + Somebody's carry on luggage
= An abundance of unwanted, and very personal, TSA attention
Attention to details is critical for maintaining National security
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